I have no idea what he sees in me. He's 28 and I'm only 16, we met over the summer and for some reason he thinks I'm just the greatest thing. I keep telling him to look else where and that I'm too young but he wont listen, at all. I'm tempted to just give in. I do like him but I'm trying to look at this logically, but my heart might have other plans.
What does he see in me? (besides sex for you perverts out there)
What should I do?
Most of all, how should I tell him?I'm in love with an older man, and I'm only 16?
schedule a lunch or dinner with him. arrive at the restaurant before he does with your father and a uniformed police officer and wait for him. You won't need to say anything.I'm in love with an older man, and I'm only 16?
It's all sex. Wake up and use logic. Why else would the pedophile want to be with you?
Sex is all he sees in you. He doesn't care about you at all and he's a pedophile. Tell him if he doesn't leave you alone you will call the cops.
Stay away from him. This guy is a criminal. When I was 28, the thought of getting with a 16 year old would have disgusted me - as it would any well adjusted adult. The fact that he is pursuing you means that there is something SERIOUSLY wrong with him. This guy is bad news. I know he is saying sweet things and making you feel really special, but that is what sexual predators do, that is how they operate. He is using that fact that girls mature faster than boys and boys your age often don't offer girls your age what you want. He may genuinely care about you, but it is based on his own sick pathology. I'm sure you're very lovable, but any 28 year old is loving you for ALL the wrong reasons. Depending on your state, what he's trying to do may be a crime.
But keep looking - the boys will catch up, and you'll find someone special. I know you may feel lonely and that you'll NEVER find that special guy out there, but trust me, there are lots of great guys out there.
What does he see in you? Besides sex, he sees innocence, he sees someone he can mold and control. He sees someone who will look up to him and he can impress. This is a guy who cannot handle women who challenge him, so he wants someone who won't challenge him. Relationships are about give and take, and two mature personalities coming together, blending, but still holding onto some part of their individuality. Something about this process freaks him out so he seeks a weaker (because you are younger and less experienced) person so he doesn't have to adjust.
What to do? If you are below the age of consent in your state, call the police. If not, I would just talk to you your mom.
But above all, stay away from this guy. I know he makes you feel special, but he is using you and he is drawing you into his pathology. Don't be his victim. Just tell him flat out that he is mentally unbalanced and you want nothing to do with him. Tell him to find some girl his own age (if he can.) You deserve better than this loser.
um isnt it illegal for a 28 yr old dude to date a minor?...
I know exactly wha you mean
Just try your best to keep him off your mind and they soon drift away
Well you should already know that you cant let anything ';happen'; but maybe if you tell him to '; wait till your older'; and then gradually drift apart if the age thing really bothers you.
IF you are dating at all at this age it should be with 16 %26amp; 17 years old ONLY and should be double-dating. YOU are much too YOUNG and YOU are NOT in love.
stay away for your own good
is he really worth it, i mean.... if a 28 year old is going for a 16 year old.. he may be kinda a dud, ya know? also, isnt that a bit illegal? if anyone finds out your involved with him he could be sent to jail for saggitory rape.
i think you should tell him if he really likes you that he should wait till your at least 20 so it wont be so illegal ha.
....you could get him in a lot of trouble....you should find someone els.if he really likes you ...he can wait...just be careful.
we are perverts because we suggest sex is the only reason he is interested? he is the pervert i'm afraid. wake up and smell the coffee... tell your mum and dad if he doesn't leave you alone, it is really important that you do that. and i'm sorry but 8 times out of 10 any guy of any age is going out with someone for the sex at the start so you've got to ask yourself why a man 12 years older would be interested in a girl that is barely past puberty. please
it is sex.
What you need to do is stop talking to him, hopefully he will get it. since a relationship with him is illegal. If you were 18 it may be different but you are still a kid and your confused. You don't want to be messing around with a 28 year old. If u dont want to stop talking to him then just tell him that you only want to be friends. If he gets mad at that he is crazy and you should get a retaining order.
He probably actually loves you. There are many things he could see in you like: beauty, intelligence, personality, love, and happiness. If you like him go for it, but do remember that dating an older man could be bad for your and his rep. People may call him a pedophile and you a hoe. I believe from past experience that dating older men is better. They're more mature and less out there. You should tell him how you feel and go from there based on a decision both of you agree on.
This is horribly wrong. If he's interested in anybody your age it's because he's a pedophile. The only thing more disturbing than his initial interest in you is the fact that you told him you're too young and he didn't listen. You need to tell you parents about this dude immediately. I have nieces a little younger than you and there would be some SEVERE consequences and repercussions If they came to me with this. Anyway, don't tell him a damn thing, tell your PARENTS. He won't get in any trouble but I bet you won't hear from him after he hears from THEM
He sees in you a younger girl who is easily impressed by the fact that he is older and more experienced. He is likely to tell you that women his age does not satisfy his needs in various ways and that your youth and freshness is something that he appreciates. But if you think about it, this is an indication that he can't deal satisfactorily with people his own age, so you should be aware of it. It's easy to manipulate younger people and tell them what they like to hear. You should think about it. Also for older people, younger people are always attractive physically. To have younger girlfriends also satisfies their ego too, as if it proves their virility, or their youthfulness compared to their own peers.(i.e. ';I can handle her'; ';I'm young at heart because I have a young girlfriend/wife.';)
And I don't want to say this but all the other respondents are correct in their assessment of this man's ulterior motives, and you can't really bypass the fact that he is sexually more experienced than you are. Sex is probably an important part of his ';attraction'; or ';romantic interest'; to you. You are so young and it's easy for him to manipulate you, no matter whatever caution you use in dealing with him. And please don't forget that his advance toward you, a minor, is illegal.
Nobody can tell you what you should do because in the end you will do only what you decide to do. But if I were you, I would hold out strong and say no to him. It's silly to have your life tied up with a man more than a decade older than you. You should be having fun and most of all learning by interacting and surviving the tough friendship/relationship situations with people your own age. You are only 16 and there is a world out there for you to experience.
How should you tell him -- this depends on the kind of relationship/interactions that you have had with him so far. But no matter what case, clearly communicating your final decisions is very important. Think of a way that you can communicate you decision to him in the most direct and clear way. Leave no room for interpretations, reading between the lines, or second guesses.
And one more thing, if he really likes you, he would wait until you reach a legal age. If he's not willing to wait, well then ... you MUST move on.
he is a sexual predator!!!
have you watched dateline NBC how to catch a predator guys like him get arrested EVERYday!
if you really want an answer RUN tell him you are to young for him because you are!
he is 26 and should be starting to settle down and you have yet to have those essential years if your life!
I know so many girls who have been hurt in so many ways due to older men like this PLEASE don't give in do yourself a favor!!!
THIS IS WHAT YOU SHOULD DO!-
even if you think it is not about sex or it cant happen to me... it can dear!... If he really cares about you he will wait 2 years until you are 18 and it is legal for the 2 of you to be together.... Trust me it will be worth it... if he sticks around and waits for you then you will know for sure that its not about sex and he truly wants to be with you! You need to remember he can get in big trouble for being with you! If you care about him you need to tell him to wait because you will be so angry with yourself if he gets in trouble because of you (even though it is his fault for pursuing)! you need to realize you have so much life in front of you and so much growing to do....
you both are in separate stages of your life and he needs to respect that.... if you tell him to give you room to grow first as an individual and in age... he better and if doesn't then he is being selfish definitely is just in it to hit it!
hope this helps!
';I'm tempted to just give in. I do like him but I'm trying to look at this logically, but my heart might have other plans. ';
Oh, honey, no.
You should be VERY wary of a twenty-eight year old - an adult - giving you *that* type of attention. I don't mean to sound patronizing, but you're only sixteen; you're still physically, mentally, and emotionally a child. A normal twenty-eight year would recognize that. He sounds like a creep, in all honesty.
it just for sex,I went out with a man older than me i was 16 and he was 30
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment