Why do Black women raise their daughters and love their sons?

Is this why we have so many irresponsible, lethargic Black men in our community? In a house where males and females are being raised, why do the roles of the male and the female seem so backwards? Why does it seem that the Black woman has so many responsible ';hats'; to wear while it would seem that the Black man has more ';leisure'; time than her?



For many Black women who work for a living, we are responsible for caring for the kids, playing chauffer, attending every recital so that your kid knows that they are loved, keeping every responsibility of the house attended to, being an involved parent at your child's school, cooking, cleaning, making holidays special, struggling to keep financial needs met,keeping your man's laundry list of expecatations met to keep him happy, giving 100% on your job, caring for elderly relatives and the list goes on and on. In the meantime, where's the Black man? Polishing up his car? At the strip club or bar every weekend? At the game? Taking a nap? Hanging out in his ';man cave';? Chasing skirts?



When we as Black mothers fail, we are crucified and blamed for not doing better. When Black men fail, they are ';just being a man'; and are given the alibi that they were not raised or socialized to be responsible. Is this true?



It's no wonder why some Black women are so irritable. We're tired as heck and resentful that we have all the work to do with little to no help.



Does it go back to how Black men are raised by their mothers? Are our expectations too low of them, is that why we get so little?



Granted, these are sweeping generalizations. Here is the disclaimer: For all of the responsible Black men out there who are involved fathers and loving and involved husbands who pull their weight, this is most definitely not for you. I applaud all of you for who you are.Why do Black women raise their daughters and love their sons?
It has little to do with their mothers and every thing to do with their culture.

I could expand but seriously, whats the point.Why do Black women raise their daughters and love their sons?
this is how it is for all of the women i know. the woman are the spine of the household. my hubby does nothing around this house except for his decent paycheque.



p.s. i'm white and all my friends are too because of where i live.
They feel that men have it easier in life and women have to be more prepared for the bad things. It's their experience leading them, not instinct.
Generally, women have more responsibility when taking care of the family. It has nothing to do with race.
Dare to be the change you want to see in the world.
Harsh.
You know me and my mom had this discussion because that's how it was and is in our family. I would not want a son because I know how hard I would have to be on him so he wouldn't turn out that way. My man is white and is very involved in our relationship and will be a very involved father as he is a husband, I would not want my side of the family catering to his every need and ';looking down'; on my daughter (which is what I am having), because they feel she should be doing the myriad of things you described in your elaboration. I want all girls but if I have a boy, my husband and I plan to teach the our children that all relationships are like bank accounts if you want something out of it, you have got to put something in it. I know the aforementioned is why I never really went out with black guys, I wanted to be in a relationship with someone who saw life, relationships and love the way I do; as something that needed to be nurtured and cared for and that's what I have. I can honestly say I, ';I'; have never met a black man, that thinks, behaves or approaches relationships the way my husband (who is Irish American) does. I know that their are Black Men out their that do, I'm just saying I have never met them in person, heard of them and about them but never met them.
This question is a grand generalisation of the most magnificent calibre. I am a white male living in a small island east of the Atlantic ocean and am frequently acceded to the realisation that 'white man can't jump'. Thus the 'black male' or as I call (masculine homosapien of most probably africanised extraction) is only semi-permeable to the laws of gravitational interlude. Though I am no fool, merely a fool patronymic by a fool's foolishness. Foolish, you see? And by the state of your grammar I am surprised you would conclude that the black woman has it difficult, and disagree. I, as a black woman encourage the prosper of diminutive service to the common good, if that reachs to the extent of grantley vowles marshall then I will have no quarrel with switzerlands jejunum. Merely laughing at its centrifugal dilemma as I drink a Coors light because these bastards won't pay me nothing. Hell I might even get on top of my wife tonight
I'm white and had a ne'er do well husband who played X box, had a social life and even a fun little drug problem while I breastfed, changed diapers, shopped, cooked...eventually, I saw that no dad was better than that dad, and sent him packing. Needless to say, there were no tears on that score. He is long gone and knows little to nothing about the wonderful little girl he contributed, in part, to.



I live in a city where there is a large black community, the young men are constantly in the news for shootings and crimes. The young women are having babies with teenage fathers who become itinerant. They've lost their way, but then so have countless other races and minorities.



We are responsible as a community for raising our children right, and setting a standard. We need to get mad about fathers feeling entitled to freedom while mom struggles to raise the child herself. How can a woman do a great job with no help? How can a kid feel good about themselves if they see only one parent trying, and caring?



This isn't just a black problem. It's everyone's problem. I'm a single mother, I know.