The worst nightmare of the man I love?

the man I love is 64 years old and he is 23 years older than me. I am 39. he used to be extremely self assured and arrogant person when we met, believed that he had figured out life in its fullness and enjoyed the fruits of his ';hard'; work. he was married three times before me and believed that marriage is a union of the similar intellectuals, a team, like an enterprise, a company. when he met me he believed that the only purpose of my life could have been to follow him and his ways and being so assured in that he did everything in his power to make that possible. he looked at me as a beautiful sensual sex obsessed young woman, not particularly bright or ambitious, with a terrible self-esteem. Whatever, we fell n love somehow with the obvious divine intervention since neither of us were allowed to see the other with our eyes opened. only in the process of running away from each other we were allowed to have a glimpse of our true personalities. It turned out that we were both deeply wrong. He appeared not so smart as I believed and I appeared not so stupid as he believed. His intention was to come to the bottom of my dreams with him to see what it was there or maybe to see how to make me happy to the ultimate.My intention was to compromise to the highest possible degree because I believed what would have been MY ideal scenario would have been impossible to have with HIM, considering his age, his job, his family, everything about him. So, my intention, I repeat was to cast away the ';ideal'; scenario of ';happiness'; because it was not a scenario of happiness with him and I loved him, I wanted POSSIBLE scenario with him, not an impossible dream, or possible reality that would destroy the person I love. So, in this process of discovering the bottom of my soul for the purpose of keeping me at all costs and giving me what I ultimately want, he forced himself into the depth of my soul completely disregarding the fact that a dream without him is not the same dream and that by doing this he is killing my love for him by force and without me having a say in it. No matter how much I tried to keep it real and POSSIBLE he went further and further obsessing deeper and deeper into problems that actually dont exist at all in reality. My belief now, after everything that I was exposed to, is that he was actually running away from me, but didnt want to say it to me (we were too deeply involved for him to just say - I cant go on like this, you are in this hell alone now, I am leaving, he is too much of a gentlemen for that) but he forced me into giving up on him. clishe, I know, that is why I said I didnt expect him to be this stupid. His worst nightmare is that he walks around with a woman 23 years younger than him, gorgeous and radiant of happiness for being with him and getting him finally, deemed by the most men in his environment either goddess from the other world or the incarnation of sensuality and womanhood in its dangerous form, having her constantly on his mind following her around from the grocery store toThe worst nightmare of the man I love?
Is this a story or a question?The worst nightmare of the man I love?
What the?I think your thinking may have scared him.But you'll do fine you HAVE selfesteem.