I am in love with a older man & I need advice how to deal with it?

I am 22 and ever since I was young I have always been attracted to older men %26amp; I don't know why and sometimes I think something is wrong with me. I mentioned it once to my friends %26amp; they think it's gross %26amp; wrong. That is why no one knows about what I am dealing with right now. Ok in short I have very strong feelings for a 37 year old man who happens to my friends dad she's 19. I met her in college %26amp; we instantly became really good friends. Then I began hanging out w/ her at her house and that's how I met her dad because she lives with him not her mom. Her dad was really nice he would just leave us alone %26amp; let us do our thing, but then we all just started hanging out %26amp; it was great. Then i realized i developed a huge crush on him like all i saw was him, I couldn't wait to be near him and I felt really comfortable w/ him and my knees would shake if i got near him etc. Then after a few months he seemed to avoid me on purpose he just wasn't coming around as much %26amp; started working late and he would leave if I was there, my friend even noticed. Then one day I finally asked him if i did something wrong (i couldn't take not being near him anymore) %26amp; he just smiled %26amp; said he was really sorry if he gave me that impression but he had a lot going on %26amp; he didn't mean to offend me or make me feel uncomfortable but he really did like me. Months passed then on his birthday my friend invited me to a little party she had for him %26amp; long story short I kissed him at the end of the night. I don't know what got into me, no one saw but he kissed me back really passionately but then he pushed me away %26amp; said that this was very wrong %26amp; he was sure he could deal with this as long as we kept our distance. Then he just said something like this';Gosh this is wrong on so many levels but I really wish you were older and you weren't my daughters friend'; ';You are so beautiful %26amp; should be with someone your own age your just going through a phase, I am so sorry for tonight please forgive me %26amp; don't take offense but please try to keep your distance from me but not my daughter she really likes etc. I was just numb but I do love him %26amp; want to pursue it but I don't want to mess up my friendship with my friend because I really do care about her but I really do care about him as well I don't know what to do Please give me REAL advice %26amp; if you had experience like this can you tell me what the best decision is %26amp; please don't be meanI am in love with a older man %26amp; I need advice how to deal with it?
I understand fully...



I was 20 when I fell in love with a 30+ year old man. Believe me it is difficult.



First of all - you should ALWAYS pick friends over guys! No matter how old the guy is.





Secondly - this man is not just going to be a man in YOUR life, but everyone you know's life.... your parents/friends/everyone you know...



Your best choice is to move on. I have had to too... but when you grow older, you can still date older men but the age gap will be smaller.



Don't throw away anything over a man. It should be pure honest and strain-free love.



Good luck!I am in love with a older man %26amp; I need advice how to deal with it?
It's basically a cultural thing. In past times there was often a big age gap between two people. It's just in our culture where people spend so long in education together that people are expected to pair off with people their own age. Then when the guy ditches the girl for someone younger after a few years (which often happens) they wonder what went wrong.



The guy seems to be behaving honourably and not taking advantage of you. There is nothing remotely wrong with the situation. You are both over the age of consent and you are not breaking up a marriage. The relationship is more likely to last than one with a guy your own age. So go for it.



OK, so it might make things a bit difficult between you and your girl friend. But it depends on which you value most---your friendship with her, or your relationship with her dad.



He is probably concerned about the situation in terms of how it might affect his relationship with his daughter. If so, it just shows again that he is a good, honourable guy. You are fortunate to have met him imho.
Go for it. He has a crush on you. If he can kiss you passionately, he can do wonders to deep stir you up.
The truth might hurt but leave him alone. It's not wrong to have feelings for older guys but not him learn and let it go.
At 22 you are an adult so i don't think it is anyone's right to judge who you date but i think this man is feeling more guilt over the fact that you are his daughter's friend than anything,had he met you another way perhaps he would see things differently but as it is you seem younger to him because he compares your age to his daughters.



Also he is probably concerned that if he becomes involved with you it will cause a rift in his relationship with her especially if it doesn't work out in the end.



No point playing games though,if you really like him it's time to have it out with him,ask him how he feels and if he thinks this is going anywhere but don't try to keep it a secret,if you are going to date it is far better for everyone to be open and honest about it,maybe if his daughter accepts the idea he will feel happier about it.