To keep or to dump the love of your life...?

I have been living with my boyfriend for 1.5 years and have just recently moved out due to some things I believe some ladies and gents could comment on.



I will keep it sweet and short, I am 19, I have been able to cook since the age of 7, Turkey dinner, you name it. Well, when i met my boyfriend his house seemed well.... not clean AT ALL. However, i moved in and thought I coould change all that... nope.



I am 19, I cook my homemade dinner everynight, give leftovers to him for lunch while Im stuck making my own lunch in the morning. He watches me cook, and doesnt wait for me to grab a drink and sit down to chat at the dinner table, he gobles it up and its gone. I feel really hurt by this, i dont know if im taking it personally but i need some input. this is my 1st bf of my life. I dont know if he has expected me to take over all cleaning and cooking duties, as well as become his designated driver for the 12 out of the 16 months we've been together since he lost his liscence 3 times. I feel used as ****. I moved out, however; we still love eachother so much. Am i being to picky? Whiney? Bitchy? I dont think so, I feeel used as ****. However, should I be happy I have love in my life and ignore the pile of stinky socks, the unclean turtle tank thats full of algae and reeks? the dirty litter box? the ants on the floor? the recycling that has sat for 3 weeks to go out to the curb? **** if this is how men are, im happy to become a lesbianTo keep or to dump the love of your life...?
Oh girly I am sorry you are in this situation! There are lots of issues going on here! For one I think he thinks you are his mom rather than his girlfreind! He has you cooking, cleaning, and driving his sorry *** around! Your not a mom and your not a slave! I understand that if this is your first boyfreind you might think this is how a relationship is supposed to be, or how all men are but the good news is that this is NOT how a relationship is supposed to work!! And not all men will treat you this way! Some will help you cook or cook for you once in a awhile and split household chores with you and not do stupid immature **** that gets their liscence taken away! He may not understand that a girl freind is not a replacement for a mom and that he needs to grow up and be an adult and treat you like a partner!



I think your attachment to him is coming from the fact that he is your first boyfreind, not that he is such a good catch! This guy sounds like a total loser, and I can't beleive you put up with any of that crap! You are not being bitchy or picky at all! You also have to realize that you can't turn people into what you wish they were. Sure people can change to a certain degree, IF they want to! This guy obviously is not what your looking for and I really don't think he loves you. I think he loves having you around to be his personal slave! I don't think he respects you or truly cares for you. If he does and you really think there is something worth saving tell him he needs to start treating you like a partner not a slave and see if he changes. If he cares he will change! Other wise don't waste your time just move on. Go find yourself a guy who treats you the way you deserve to be treated! You do not deserve this and I am sure there are plenty of guys out there who would be happy to treat you right! Have some respect for yourself and demand that others do too, you deserve it!To keep or to dump the love of your life...?
wait so who's who?
Maybe you should ask him :)



Guys don't always get our little hints, so it's better to just tell them straight up. It will save you and him a lot of time and useless arguments.



Try saying:

';I cook this dinner for you, and I want to spend some time to talk to you. Please wait for me.';



Don't just give up like that over something silly!
Wrong question...

If you are willing to dump this guy, he clearly isn't the love of your life.
Dump him. I know this may sound harsh but it sounds like he only wants a cook %26amp; a maid. He's definately using you. He also sounds incredibly immature. You deserve better than that male chauvanist pig. Good Luck.
he's taking you for granted in the worst way. Keep it moving, dude is trifling! your heart will heal with time. You'll never be happy if you stay.
Sloth and filth are no excuse. If he loves you, he can pitch in, or at least say THANK YOU. You know that, miss.

I'd smack his *** for being stupid about it. Don't dump him right out, give him time to do something about what's wrong, and let him KNOW what's wrong so he knows what to fix and how to fix it. If he lets you down then, be clear about why you're upset, and let go.

Besides, when I snuggle, I like to smell GOOD, not like algae~ %26gt;.%26lt;
Okay so you sound verryyy similar to what happened to me. I was the same age and everything. So ok, first and foremost...beome a lesbian :] Im not lesbian, but geez im on the fence now..ha. But ok, this is unfortunately the way a LOT of men are. So many of them do not mind all of that disgusting mess enough to do anything about it. And if you're cleaning up all of it, and taking care of pretty much everything, as it sounds like you are, then he's never gunna do any of it. He likes it that way..being a lazy bum. What you did, by moving out, was good for you..but not really for the relationship. Do be grateful that you have love, yes. but do not ever let that love take advantage of your kind heart. That's what happened to me....My first real boyfriend..we were engaged and all..living together for 2 years then things just went horribly sour. Basically, all my hard work that i put into that relationship went down the crapper. I learned from it. And moved on..It is better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all is such a true quote. Be happy you've had this experience but if you're feeling used, as you have the right to feel, and you're terribly unhappy, then drop it. You're 19 you WILL find more love...whether it be a man or not ;)