What reasons would keep a man from marrying a woman after he they have been together and share children?

A man37 is with a woman36 on and off for 12 yrs and they share 3 kids. The man cheated in the past and isnt ready to be married;now he says';she deserve to get married, but im just not ready. Its not a refelection on how much i love her its that im just learning how to be to be a good boyfriend.Here is the disagreement between me and my mother. My mother says if he is being honest then its her decision and that she knows a few who did it longer than 12 years and know woman who still does and she rather a man telling her the truth about who is having sex with while in a commited relationship than to see him and and another woman. Daughter: As far as the other woman I think it would hurt even if he was being honest or not, when another person is openly sleeping with people its no longer a serious relationship and STDs are real and espAIDS. I feel like if a man tells me I complete him+I have given birth to kids then why not marry? Who would you agree with Mother or Daughter? HELP Plz!What reasons would keep a man from marrying a woman after he they have been together and share children?
Why would she want to marry someone who has proven himself a cheater anyway? The reason why he doesn't want to get married is that she is giving him everything for free. Is she wearing a bit sign across her forehead that says ';doormat';?What reasons would keep a man from marrying a woman after he they have been together and share children?
I would agree with your daughter, what your mother said is just ridiculous, no offense, but listen to your daughter.

oh yea..what Liz said is very true.
I would suggest that the reason he is not marrying you is because he sees no reason to. He already has everything he wants and doesn't have to get married. If this arrangement does not work for you any longer than it is time to be upfront with him and give him some options. You may have to face the fact that he is never going to marry you and if marriage is something you truly want then it might be time to find somebody else.
OK....You're joking me, right? On and off for 12 years, kids and no marriage?



Go immediately, do not pass Go!, do not collect $200 - and buy the book ';He's Just Not That In To You';.....



Any man (or woman) who is on again and off again and is still not married after all that time (and having kids) is keeping his/her options open. Simple as that. There is no sense in tolerating cheating just for the sake of not being alone.



They're setting a bad example for their children - this is a disfunctional relationship!!!
This guy is SO FULL OF IT.. ';man cheated in the past and isnt ready to be married;now he says';she deserve to get married, but im just not ready. Its not a refelection on how much i love her its that im just learning how to be to be a good boyfriend';. What a irresponsible JERK. Not ready????? 12 years and three kids later???? Show ';Mr. God's gift to women'; the door and tell him to get a vasectomy.And tell him to look up MATURITY in the dictionary.
Personally I would rather not be married to this man!Rather than pushing for commitment from this loser run like hell.A man doesn't marry a woman for the simple reason that he doesn't want to.If he is getting away with this behavior then there is no incentive for marriage because he can do as he pleases.
Why buy the cow if the milk is free? Are you or your mother the woman in question? If not, shouldn't you mind your own business? Are either of you involved with the guy? And if you are, why would you bother with someone you know has commitments(children are commitments whether you label it that way or not) has life long commitments, with someone else? It certainly is a good way to complicate ones life!