Surely the craziest and most destructive form of infidelity is the temporary insanity of falling in love. You do this, not when you meet somebody wonderful (wonderful people don't screw around with married people) but when you are going through a crisis in your own life, can't continuing living your life, and aren't quite ready for suicide yet. An affair with someone grossly inappropriate-someone decades younger or older, someone dependent or dominating, someone with problems even bigger than your own-is so crazily stimulating that it's like a drug that can lift you out of your depression and enable you to feel things again. Of course, between moments of ecstasy, you are more depressed, increasingly alone and alienated in your fife, and increasingly hooked on the affair partner. Ideal romance partners are damsels or ';dumsels'; in distress, people without a life but with a lot of problems, people with bad reality testing and little concern with understanding reality better.
Romantic affairs lead to a great many divorces, suicides, homicides, heart attacks, and strokes, but not to very many successful remarriages. No matter how many sacrifices you make to keep the love alive, no matter how many sacrifices your family and children make for this crazy relationship, it will gradually burn itself out when there is nothing more to sacrifice to it. Then you must face not only the wreckage of several lives, but the original depression from which the affair was an insane flight into escape.
People are most likely to get into these romantic affairs at the turning points of life: when their parents die or their children grow up; when they suffer health crises or are under pressure to give up an addiction; when they achieve an unexpected level of job success or job failure; or when their first child is born-any situation in which they must face a lot of reality and grow up. The better the marriage, the saner and more sensible the spouse, the more alienated the romantic is likely to feel. Romantic affairs happen in good marriages even more often than in bad ones.
Both genders seem equally capable of falling into the temporary insanity of romantic affairs, though women are more likely to reframe anything they do as having been done for love. Women in love are far more aware of what they are doing and what the dangers might be. Men in love can be extraordinarily incautious and wining to give up every-thing. Men in love lose their heads-at least for a while.What do you think of this? It saved my marriage.?
very insightful. A good warning for all! Just DO NOT DO IT.
thanks...may it save more marriages! Yea!What do you think of this? It saved my marriage.?
One word for this one, bravo!!!!
wow. all that stuff you said about it, and your saying it saved your marraige? im in shock. anyway thanks for the info i think you hit the nail on the head. this is exactly the truth about things. thanks
It's just sad that mature people don't know cheating is always wrong on their own. How about citing your source?
And woman don't.,.... Your point sucks!!!!
Personally, I think that having a romantic love affair is a load of bullshit. When you have an affair not only are you lying to yourself and your spouse, but to your family and your children. I think people who have any type of affair are selfish and immature. I feel like if you want to stray, be man or woman enough to let your partner no. Don't you think he or she has that right?
i just got out of a long term relationship where my other half had an affair not only did it hurt me it hurt my daughter ican say that i forgave but i never forgot and i believe that destroyed my relationship
You could go on and on...and on.
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