How can a ';love shy'; man get the girl of his dreams?

I am a love shy man, I am 42 years old and have never had a proper relationship with a woman. I do have a close female friend who I have know for about 12 years. We met when we work together while she was a student and I worked in the shop she had a part time job in. She was 19 at the time and I was 30. Normally I have felt very nervous around women and unable to talk to them but with her it was different and we became friends. Admittedly I felt more than friendship for her but as she was seriously involved with another man at the time I put those feelings to the side and in a way it also took the pressure off, knowing that there would be nothing more between us. After she finished college she moved away but we kept in touch she would visit me once or twice a year and we often spoke on the phone or played chess online! All this time she was with the same man and it seemed that they would always be together.

However in the past year the relationship has ended amicably as he has taken a job over seas and she is returning to study. She will be visiting me again for the first time since she and her partner split next month and I'm already feeling nervous, it feels like all these feelings I have repressed for so long are bubbling up and taking over. I want to much to be more than a friend to her and yet I'm terrified that she will reject me. Even just talking to her on the phone recently has left me a gibbering wreck.



What can I do to test the waters with her without scaring her off or losing her friendship?



Note: If you don't understand love shyness pls see this link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Love-shynessHow can a ';love shy'; man get the girl of his dreams?
Well, if you really have feelings for her, you MUST talk to her, no matter how hard it is. I mean, she's your friend. She'll listen to you. But you might be rushing it with her recent break up. It was about a month ago, right? Well, give her a little time. And then talk to her about your true feelings. It's normal to be scared, but because of your condition, it becomes almost impossible to talk, huh? Well, you just have to try. And if you can't, try telling her some other way. Good luck!How can a ';love shy'; man get the girl of his dreams?
By not being love shy...
Dam dude im 12 and i used to be with a girl. Just think what ur gonna say to her and ask her out.
If you are 42 %26amp; you dont know what makes a girl TICK then you must not have men that guy everyone wants to be around or even look at sorry. but 42! you should be giving us advice!
there is this unspoken rule that once a girl is friends with a guy for a certain period of time, than you miss that window to be romantic.



If she likes you that way, well woman have a way of making it evident, we are master flirts. So if you want to ask her without letting on or ruining your friendship im afraid you have to get a third party to ask. maybe her friend or once i opened a fake myspace account to discover if this guy i was taking to was a ho or not, found out he was. Recording devices anything will revail the truth but never ask her directly you might not want to know the answer.
First of all, don't listen to those assholes. It doesn't matter how old the man is, just get over it. I'm 15 myself and im not sure if i can help much but i'll try my best. Maybe you should try just explain the best you can to her about how you feel i know you're love shy but you should be able to get just a little out and if she seems interested what you're, at least, trying to say that should tell you that she has to like you in some way which might stop the anxiety its just like asking a girl out for the first time, for the people who don't understand, you are nervous as hell but once you see she likes you a weight comes off you're shoulders and you can finally say everything you wanted to in the first place. I hope that helps man. good luck and don't get discouraged by these other people