My fiance's best friend is in love with me - how can we help him not get hurt?

My fiance and I have a happy, standardly monogamous relationship and will be getting married soon. The problem is that I think his best friend is deeply in love with me. He is in his late 30's and still a virgin. He is actually not bad-looking at all, in fact he is good looking and a great person, just very shy and a computer geek so it just kinda never happened for him. He definitely has that look in his eye when he looks at me, and recently when we were alone he worked up the courage to just barely tell me aloud what was painfully obvious to all of us. I can tell he thinks we'd be great together, but this is because of his inexperience. To my eyes it is clear that even if I were single I would likely not return his feelings, as you mature and have relationships you just get to know what works, and he wouldn't work as a mate for me. Add that on top of the obvious fact that the man I love and will soon be marrying is his best friend, and the poor guy is pretty much in a hopeless pickle. It's painful to watch him struggle with this, it breaks our hearts really.



Now my fiance is not jealous at all, he knows nothing is up. But I really worry for the feelings of the friend, he is a lovely person, he has a tender heart that will be hurt when we marry - and he will be in our lives forever regardless. We both like him very much personally. I don't think it's actually real love he feels necessarily, just inexperience and infatuation because he and I share some interests and beliefs - you know how nerdy guys can be when you agree with them about esoterica. But it FEELS like true love to him, he just doesn't know any better. What should I do to help him? Should I talk to him, or maybe my husband to be? My fiance and I are both worried that he will become upset and not want to be our friend anymore when we marry, and we both love him and want to keep him around.My fiance's best friend is in love with me - how can we help him not get hurt?
I would have your fiance talk to him and try to set him up on one of those dating sites. That way he might be able to get his mind off of you and find a new girl. I'm sorry about your situation, that's a tricky one. Good luck!My fiance's best friend is in love with me - how can we help him not get hurt?
Have your soon to be husband and a couple of his friends go out and hire a hooker to hook up with him for a night. Set it up as a blind date and inform the hooker she is definatly being paid to pop this mans cherry. He will soon have a new love interest and when he cannot find her or learns of her ocupation he may finally see the light and find himself a woman. Good Luck
That's a really tough situation. I think you and your fiance should both go talk to him and get things straightened out.