How do you get and keep a man?

This is a serious question. After being single for several years, I do have the desire to find someone for love and to be loved in return. I don't have much relationship experience (what I do have came from when I was a teenager). I go on dates but I haven't had any success in taking things to another level. I don't know if it's me or not.



All in all, I have a lot to offer. But, anyway, what do I do to get a guy and keep him interested and wanting more of me?



I am willing to do whatever I have to do to find someone that I can love- if it means changing my appearance or personality. And I know that there is NOTHING wrong with my appearance now.



I just began to admit to myself that I deserve a good man after years of low self-esteem. For years, I have believed that I am not worthy of anyone's love but I am trying to change that mindset. I am in my mid 20s....Please help!How do you get and keep a man?
To get a man, you must seduce him.



To keep a man, you will want to follow these three easy steps:

1) Give him a bj

2) Make him a sandwich

3) Shut up



I know is sounds rude or harsh, but that's what works. Men are simple creatures and easy to please. We require sex, food, and silence. Everything else is trivial.How do you get and keep a man?
Read The Rules. It's an awesome book! I was in your same situation and it was very helpful.
Treat him like a king. Don't dump emotionally on him. Don't let him walk on you. Give him space. Don't judge him for past expierences or past girlfriends. Love him for who he is now. Keep your confidence high.
you don't need a man to be happy, just be yourself and enjoy life.
';I am willing to do whatever I have to do to find someone that I can love- if it means changing my appearance or personality.';



That's very sweet of you, but ultimately that mindset will lead to failure. You may attract a man, but that man is not in love with you. He is in love with what you are projecting.



Some recommendations for you:



1. Relax and enjoy the dates: I remember when I was in my teens and early 20's. I used to think that if you went out with someone, one of two things would eventually happen. Either I would meet my future mate or one of us would end up dumping the other. What happened was that I put a lot of unnecessary pressure on myself. I regret that, because I should have been enjoying dates for what they were. . . a chance to share the company of someone for the evening.

It sounds like you may have the same mindset. You go out on dates, but you are looking so far into a potential mate that you end up driving yourself or the other person away. Which leads to . . .



2. Enjoy this station of your life, whatever it is. You could wake up tomorrow and find this special someone you have been looking for. When you do, your life changes. That freedom to do as you want when you want is gone. Therefore, enjoy this time in your life. Time will change your circumstances soon enough.



3. ';To be loved, be loveable'; - Ovid:

What are the most lovable things about you? You sound like a very loving, generous person. Accent those things about your personality. Don't reinvent yourself. Stick to the things you like about yourself and build on them.
Just be yourself and don't be pushy. Only do what makes you feel good, don't allow anyone to push you into anything you feel uncomforatable doing. If you treat them like a king, you will loose them. Men for some odd reason, like women who treat them like dirt. Women who spoil them, never keep them.
What you are is what you attract.



And read the book mentioned in the first response, as well as some things from Dr. Phil (yeah, I know, but sometimes he not too bad.)



1. I think the nicest thing to look at in a man is his smile, and to him, your smile. If you don't have a killer smile, get it from the best cosmetic dentist you can afford. Beautiful teeth are healthy, and healthy is sexy.



2. If you are satisfied with your appearance, see if your girl friends agree.



3. Maybe see a counselor for an attitude adjustment, and learn the points of conversation.... (let them do most of the talking, never complain, and if it ain't nice, don't say it.) If you find someone you like, don't rush the bedroom stuff.... it ain't a numbers game.



there's lots more... write it this isn't enough....I'm not young --- 56 --- and have never been alone very long, married twice, the last one I left after a loooooong marriage (he cheated, I ran...), and found someone within two years who is loving, smart educated, yada, yada, all the things on my list. We have been together 2 1/2 years, and are planning to buy a house together as soon as we can find one we both like.



And try things like Yahoo Personals and Match.. There are just lots of great guys looking for a solid relationship, and of course a few nut cases just like those next to you in church.

The photos you post have got to be great, but casual, with that killer smile.



Everyone who wants to be in a relationship needs to learn the skills of resolving issues without resentment and rage, and some counseling for sure will help you.
Just be yourself. You will meet someone if it is really yours.